Prayers

I have been so stressed out this week. Honestly I can't even explain why. I guess it's just everything happening at once. I haven't seen Ryan in a few days because he's been working every night. I have been fighting with my parents over stupid things. I'm getting behind on homework, and laundry, and thank you cards that need to be written. And to top it all off, I've been having terrible headaches every few days. They bring dizziness and nausea and fatigue and I'm just so tired of them. So today it just really got me down. I've been holding back tears every time I think about it. Well, tonight Ryan called me at 8:00, just like he does every night that he has to work. I answered his call and we talked for about 30 minutes. I tried to keep it short and didn't say much. He eventually asked me why I sounded so sad and I confessed that I'm really stressed out and didn't know why, perhaps just a build up of several things. And when I was about to begin crying, I had to stop myself from speaking. And Ryan asked me then, "how many times have you prayed today?" I admitted that I had not prayed at all today. I was ashamed and sad. Here I am struggling with stress and worry and anxiety and the God of the universe is available to hear me out, and I'm not even taking advantage of it. What on earth is wrong with me? I need to make a change. So tonight I'm praying for peace and understanding in my own life. I'm praying that this season of change in my life, will not cause me pain and fear any longer. I'm praying for my world to slow down just a little bit and give me time to catch my breath. I'm praying that people will see the peace in me and wonder why I've changed. I'm praying that they will be so perplexed by it, that they'll ask me what's up and God, when that happens, give me the words to say to tell people that you're the only reason for my peace.